Raising kids in a fast paced world has never been more challenging making intentional parenting a necessity. Many of us moms borrow a leaf from our own parents and people we admire who are doing a great job of parenting their own kids. We have come to know that times are changing and what worked then will not necessarily work now and no two children are the same. As you settle in with finding a method that works with your first child, the next one comes along and throws you completely off your track with a different temperament and you are left with finding new ways to reach your newest addition. We can however find a common ground for all of them.
What is intentional parenting?
Simply put, it is having a plan for parenting and consciously incorporating it into your daily routine. It does not end with having good intentions, that is just the beginning. It is seizing every moment with your kids and making it a time to connect and teach and connect with them in ways that you can still influence them later on in life. It is developing a strong, positive relationship with your kids. It begins with you showing the way, children copy your actions faster than they do what they are told to do. As a mom, it behoves on you to be mindful of your words and actions because if they do not agree all you are trying to teach them will be an exercise in futility. Again, it begins with you, mom.
Why it is important that we as moms are mindful is because we can be unintentionally parenting our kids the wrong way. Our hurtful words and actions will have unintended consequences on their psyche and affect their development. Unintentional parenting could also mean leaving a child to grow up without restraint and hoping they will learn as adults.
How to be intentional in your parenting
- You have to know what you want for your child - the kind of adult you are molding him into. When you have this in mind it will inform way you build it into him in little ways. I would suggest teaching one virtue at a time like respect, gratefulness or love, until he can start mirroring it back to you.
- Being consistent is of great essence. You cannot begin only to give up along that way, you have to keep reminding him gently until it sinks into his consciousness. Creating a routine will also benefit your cause.
- Be intentional in discipline too and follow through with negative or positive consequences. Allow them to make mistakes so they can learn from it and also develop coping skills along the way. Don't always feel the need to cushion their fall.
- Be involved in your children's life. Watch them to know what interests them in be a part of it and fuel the fire for learning.
- Know your child's strength and weaknesses and work to amplify his strengths.
- Use what motivates your kids as a teaching tool recognising that each child is unique. Provide the ground rules and allow them find their way.
- Spend as much time as you can with your kids and co-opt your spouse into doing same. It is easier when done in partnership because both of you are in agreement about what you want. That way, you can be accountable to each other and have some time to yourself to refill.
Benefits of intentional parenting
- You will raise confident kids who think independently and are problem solvers
- It will help your children develop strong social and emotional skills
- It help children to be productive and organised as they meet set goals
- It makes for a purpose-driven life
No one said it was going to be a walk in the park and there is easy way around it. You are not expected to be perfect just keep giving it your best. Please share our post and follow us for more of Savvymomsville. Thank you!
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