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Effective Parenting Strategies: How To Raise Firstborn Children The Right Way

     When it comes to parenting, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Each child is unique and requires different parenting styles to thrive. However, firstborns often have a special place in the family dynamic, and their upbringing can have a significant impact on they turn out in future. In this post, we will explore the unique challenges and opportunities that come with being the firstborn in a family. We will provide practical tips and strategies for parents to help their firstborns develop into confident, responsible, and successful individuals. Whether you are a first-time parent or have several children, we will provide valuable insights into raising firstborns right. From setting clear expectations to avoiding common pitfalls, this article will equip you with the tools you need to help your firstborn thrive.  Have you read Parenting and the Curse of the Firstborn? Understanding Firstborns Firstborn children hold a unique position in the family dynamic. They are often the fi

How To Live In The Moment As A New Mom

A little boy giving his laughing mom a kiss on the cheek

     So often we wait for the right moment when we can be happy, a time when we can be free of chores, mediating between the kids and going to bed exhausted. We let our minds fall into the trap of waiting for the perfect time and we decide that when that day comes, we will be happy. The perfect day is not a day when we have all our expectations met, it is a day that we are pleasantly surprised by something good despite what we are going through presently. It reminds me that there is a God out there who answers prayers

I recall that in times past I have often waited for the perfect day to come; when I finish writing my exams, when I graduate, when I finish National Youth Service Corps when I finally get a job and start earning some income... Each time I attained those goals it didn't feel like a perfect day, those events would take place without making the impact I thought they would.  

Life is a mix of highs and lows, if every day met our expectations we would not discover who we are or what we can do. It is when we are at our lowest point that we learn to rise above it all like a phoenix from the ashes. It is in the dark times of our lives that we learn life's lessons, restructure our present realities, develop courage, face our fears, are stretched and become wiser. When we triumph over our struggles we become stronger and can help someone else who is going through the same struggle that we did. So something good did come out of that phase after all.

     A new mom's life can be so overwhelming especially when you are still trying to find the dynamics that work for you. There will always be something left to do: cleaning, washing, diaper change or a wet nose that needs to be wiped clean. Time can seem so fleeting. You can get lost in all of it and miss out on life's moments. As a young mom myself, I have found a few ways to help me live in the moment and keep my sanity:

1. Banish negative thoughts. Do you sometimes find your actions mirroring your thoughts? Our thoughts are very powerful, when your mind begins to drift towards negative feelings of overwhelm or self-pity, you need to stop that train of thought right there. Focus your mind on the things that make you happy, recall happier times or recite the word of God to yourself.

2. Be thankful. Thank God for his blessings in your life - the gift of family, friends, good health, life and everything else. Appreciate the people in your life also for the help you receive. This action will open your eyes to how much you have been taking your blessings for granted. Be thankful that you have the time to spend with your kids, and watch them grow and influence their lives.

3. Read and meditate on the word of God. You will find that your mind will be filled with peace in the midst of all that is going on around you. God has promised his children peace that passes understanding. The word of God is also a guide, let it teach you how to raise your kids and be the best you can be.

4. Do something that makes you happy. Read a book, watch a movie, work on that project or abandoned dreams. There are many versions of you: mom, homemaker, entrepreneur and you work it all like a pro even though you don't feel like it sometimes.

5. Have fun together. You remember that popular saying, 'If you can't beat them join them. Join them in their games, teach them and also let them teach you. It could be indoor or outdoor games. It will strengthen your bond as a family and you will be more appreciative of life's precious moments.

6. Let them be your source of never-ending entertainment. I find myself laughing when my son tries to imitate what I say or the things I do. These little acts make my day and allow me to see the world through his eyes too. I'm sure any mom can relate. 

7. Learn to just be. Revel in the wonder of how blessed you are, how much you have been through in life and overcame, watch and enjoy your kids' antics, enjoy your meals and not just gulp them down, breathe, listen and be lost in the wonder of it all, the wonder of being alive.

     As I write this article, I have a son who is a few weeks short of two years and a one-month-old baby girl. My home needs cleaning, some clothes need washing, there is lunch to be prepared, I've not had a bath and it's 12:39 pm! This is as perfect as it can be, life's moments are those little joys we overlook. I get what you are going through, I simply remind myself to take my advice and I hope you do too. Cheers to being an amazing mom!

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